Famous Hockey Broadcaster Quotes

Darren Pang's Freudian slip on TSN:



Canucks broadcaster Tom Larscheid:

“Bingo, bango, bongo, his name is Roberto Luongo!”


"Kirk McLean is so fundamentally sound. Look at how erect he is in the net."

"What are you...some kind of goof?"

"I just came from the Canucks dressing room and Pavel's groin has never felt better."

"Bure is such a great talent, if only he could play with himself out there, it will really give the fans a show"

"Bure goes around him like a drugstore Indian!"

At the following game:

"I would like take this opportunity to extend a sincere apology for offensive comments I made in the last broadcast..."

Don Taylor - SportsNet Broadcaster

"He bulges the twine!'

"He ripples the mesh"

“Top Shelf! Where Mom keeps the peanut butter”

"...gathering speed ... skating gingerly ... enormous save!"

"Chris Kunitz ... now there's a name I don't want to mispronounce!"

"The flightless birds" - the Pittsburgh Penguins
"The Cloven-Hoofed Ones" the New Jersey Devils
"The Muscular Fowl of Anaheim" - the Anaheim Ducks

Don Taylor's Bio from SportsNet:
"I'm a frustrated athlete-turned sportscaster. Loved hockey, loved lacrosse, loved football … pathetic at all of 'em. This did not go over well in a family of six kids that included three older brothers, all of whom were of the "how can you be so smart and so good at sports too?" type. I was outcast. As a result, I went into a shell. Literally. At the age of seven, I found a large clam shell on a Stanley Park beach and lived inside of it for several months. To this day, the combination of lemon juice and butter makes me nervous."

"Goalies are three sandwiches shy of a picnic"

Jim Taylor - Hockey Writer

"Playoff hockey is not exactly hockey. It is hockey's older, snarling brother who just got out of prison."

John Keating of Fox Sports Detroit.

"That's good news for the Maple Leafs, who will have somewhere to watch the playoffs."

The Spectator, after hearing that a new 30-foot-by-50-foot HD video screen was being erected on the exterior of the Air Canada Centre.

Goalie Quotes

"Goalies are three sandwiches shy of a picnic"
Jim Taylor - Hockey Writer

Roberto Luongo:

“We had some mental mistakes, myself included.”

“When it was 7-0, I had to check the scoreboard to make sure it was right.”

"We don't expect to sweep every series"
After Loosing the second game in round 2 against the Blackhwaks, after sweeping St.Louis in round 1 in 2009.

"It was not an equipment problem. Let's leave it like that."
Nature calls unexpected going into overtime in 2007.

“Call Luongo the best goaltender in the league,”
Blackhawks coach Denis Savard after his team lost in a shootout to the Canucks.

“Bingo, bango, bongo, his name is Roberto Luongo!”
Canucks broadcaster Tom Larscheid

Patrick Roy:

"I could not hear what they say about me, my 2 Stanley Cup rings were stuffed in my ears."


"I guess they respect my shot because they were all ready at the blue line."
Patrick Roy, on his attempt at the Edmonton Oilers empty net.

"Every time a puck gets past me and I look back into the net, I say, 'uh-oh.'"
Bernie Parent

"I'm not dumb enough to be a goalie."
Brett Hull

"I've told you guys before, goalies don't think.
Chris Osgood

"Hockey is the only job I know where you get paid to have a nap on the day of the game."
Chico Resch

"Having a goal scored against youis like getting your pants taken down in front of 15,000 people"
Glenn Hall

"One road trip we were stuck on the runway for seven hours. The plane kept driving and driving until we arrived at the rink and I realized we were on a bus.”
Glenn Healy, on his time in the IHL

"You try to squeeze a little more Charmin in the pads when you face him."
Kevin Hodson, goalie, on Al MacInnis


"How would you like a job where, every time you make a mistake, a big red light goes on and 18,000 people boo?"
Jacques Plante

"When I first put on the mask, the boys all told me I would scare the women.They wouldn't come to see the games anymore. I'll tellyou something, if I went on the way I was going, pretty soon my face wood look worse than the mask."
Jacques Plante

"We are the sort of people who make health insurance popular."
Terry Sawchuk, former Red Wings goaltender

"It seems the more shots he sees, the better he plays," Michael Cammalleri on goaltender Jaroslav Halak, who was brilliant in stopping 53 of 54 shots to force game 7 against the Washington Capitals in the 2009 / 2010 playoffs

Scotty Bowman Quotes

"You wasted over 7 million in cap space for him?!"

Scotty not impressed with Campbell after allowing the Canucks to score in Game 1 during the second round of the 2009 playoffs

“There is nothing so uncertain as a sure thing.”

“I've KO'd a lot of guys verbally. I've got one of the most vicious knockout punches with the tongue of anyone on earth.”

“Hockey is its own game. It's completely different than all other games, although it's getting way too close to soccer.”

“I love Barry Manilow .”

“'Mandy' ... that's my favorite song of all time. Man, oh, man.”

Kyle Wellwood Quotes

Don Cherry during the postgame show after Game 1 of the 2009 Canucks - Blackhawks Playoff series:

“Here’s Wellwood, Seven-and-oh in the faceoffs, plus-two, two assists, played 20 minutes, drew eight minutes on the power play, lost a tooth and a pint of blood. What a guy.”

Alain Vigneault:

"Kyle was our best player on the ice. At least now he looks like a hockey player."